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How to Overcome Depression When Loosing Hope

Don’t suffer in silence. It’s going to be temporary.

I have been depressed and also know how it feels like to be close to falling into a depressive season during many disappointing times, when things didn’t turn out the way I wanted them to turn out.

For example, I got very disappointed when I found out about a medical diagnosis that can affect my fertility. I also was very angry and felt taken advantage of the time when I found out that a doctor at the ER misdiagnosed me with a pre-existing condition with no evidence of it. I also got disappointed the day when I found out that I had to pay money up front for my upcoming surgical procedure.

I also have had a rough time when I had self-doubtful thoughts about a career path I started. Want another example? During my twenties, I started feeling depressed when I realized I hadaccumulated pain I felt from a lifetime of emotional abuse by a family member was impacting my life and the way I viewed myself.

I think I covered enough examples for now. I’m not writing this to seek a solution or tips. Although you can still post them as comments in the below section. I actually have learned a huge lot from each disappointment and I have noticed that I’m not the only one dealing with these things. I’m writing this because I want to share with you that I didn’t give up while facing those disappointments, I kept fighting and hoping that something good is waiting for me on the other side. Even in unfair situations, I was able to appeal and request for my diagnosis to be changed. So the following are my tips which you can try as many as you would like to:

Seeking counseling

Yes, this is important. No matter if you decide to seek counseling with a therapist, your friend, a mentor, spouse or your pastor, it’s much better when you can do this with a professional counselor! I have received counseling from friends, mentors and therapists and I find that the most pain I’ve been able to process has been through the help of therapists. They are trained to process painful moments with you. I’m better at communicating how I feel and more vulnerable in my relationships because of the healing I received from receiving counseling.

Help others

Putting your attention to other people, one person at a time, can make a huge impact in your journey. I say this from experience, that helping others have helped me not fall into a “victim” mentality for too long. If there is something I can do for someone, I am less likely to spend all of my time thinking about my life situation. In addition, it feels great to know your unique set of personality, temperament, humor and the way you express yourself can help other people. When I used to go through disappointing times, I used to believe in the lie that “I’m not good enough for others.” But it was a lie that I had to notice.

Connect with your support system

This is very important by the way. When you connect with people who will support you and be there for you, you are less likely to engage in unhealthy behavior as a way to respond to the recent disappointment.

It is your support system that will encourage you, help you not stick around negative thoughts for too long, process with you and help you have fun in the midst of how challenging this season can be.

Do something fun even when you don’t feel like it

This can be hard to do. If it is hard to find something fun or to not “flake” on fun plans, I highly encourage you to do fun things with your support system. They will become more fun. And also, if you have a hard time doing things by yourself, try to learn from those who like to spend time with themselves.

If you have a hard time with keeping your plans with your support system, I encourage you to say to yourself “I’m excited to spend time with them.”

Journal your gratitude list as often as you can

This is something I notice really helps anyone who is going through a depressive season. I have learned that being thankful also brings me closer to God and those I’m thankful for. Love that feeling!

Find joy in the simple things of life

What do you naturally enjoy doing? Whatever you enjoy, I encourage you to ensure you plan to do that in your weekly schedule and try to bring a friend if you can to make sure you show up to do that activity together.

Some examples of activities that can organically bring joy are: hugging an animal, hugging a teddy bear, cooking a home made meal or dessert, watching a funny video, playing a sport or a video game, drinking your favorite drink while reflecting on your blessings, and many more.

Don’t Stop Dreaming: use your imagination to imagine the good things that you used to hope for

Close your eyes, and imagine yourself surviving your unique situation. Where would you be a month, 6 months and a year from today?

That’s it, try one and let me know how it went.

Here are some resources if you or someone you know want more support in their journey towards overcoming depression:

Sign up for coaching to work towards healthier habits: HERE

An online Support Group for those suffering from depression to not go through it alone: HERE

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